a little thing is a big thing

I've lived with this wound that gets bigger by the day keeping quiet about it and just hoping things would change if I pray. Loving you was all I ever wanted and could do but after long sleepless nights, I've decided you couldn't love me too. Your actions speak louder in fact they even shout your words mean nothing, just nonsense that you talk about the words "I love you" have no meaning at all coming from you its just your way of holding on to the only love that's true. You hold onto me unable to let go however the reason is not because you love me so In your eyes I'm just someone that is always there the only woman in this world that ever showed you she cared But you cant appreciate that, you cant appreciate me how much more did you think I could take before I set myself free. Do you honestly think I don't hurt each night that I'm alone do you think I'm still that teenage girl that has not yet grown? My mind is different its more wiser now I'm not that same teenage girl that for you fell I'm not blind anymore nor am I naive I know what you are and I feel your deceit I may not show it much but I have grown tired of it all lonely days and nights with nothing more than a phone call and being placed second or even third to all your outrageous corruptions, you don't think that hurts? Knowing you're never there, knowing I'm always getting played knowing the only support I get from you is from your sister and mom, when I try to talk to you, I just waste my breath I just get myself more stressed out to the feeling of nothing left I cant go on like this, I'm sorry I've grown weak I need someone to be there for me now, someone that will listen when I speak, a man that can hold my hand when things get harder everyday, someone that wont leave me alone, so that he can go out and play. A man that is a man, and full of joy a man that sees me for me and not just a toy someone that's way different than you, someone that will appreciate all that I do.